Wednesday, March 17, 2010

the curious incident of the duck in the night time, part 1 - by the mvp

it's 1 am. or so i assume, even without the benefit of a clock. it's quiet, except for the hum of the white noise machine. everyone's asleep. i've had my midnight feeding, and must have dozed off. but the milk is still sloshing around in my stomach, so it can't be much later than 1. elementary, my dear watsons.

'mother, father' say i. 'i am alone in a cold sterile crib, and you are shirking your parently duties.' at least that's what i mean to say. instead, it comes out 'waaah, waaah, huh huh huh waaaaaaaaaaaaah.' damned underdeveloped vocal tract.

my mother lets out a single-syllable exclamation. it sounds like 'puck.' what could it mean.

i examine the possible interpretations. puck could be a literary reference. i quickly dismiss that explanation. it's march 16... hardly a midsummer night. anyway, my folks aren't the types to be quoting shakespeare if you know what i mean. 60 watt bulbs, the both of them. now if puck was a contestant on american idol... i'd totally buy it.

it could be a hockey reference. unlikely. in my entire life, i've seen my parents watch maybe 5 minutes of hockey. i thought i'd catch the gold medal match between canada and the usa, but they instead switched to curling on cnbc. i think the pace of curling makes it a little easier for them to keep up, bless their gumpish little hearts. anyway, my pop has already assured me that, because i was born in december, every second i spend thinking about hockey is a second wasted.

no, it wasn't puck.

as i quickly consider and discard several other possibilities --luck, chuck, muck, canuck, and darius rucker-- my eyes start to adjust to the darkness. and that's when i see it. looming above me like the sword of damocles. two beady little eyes, staring. skin the color of a jaundiced papaya. an orange bill, pursed as if to whisper dark commands into my ear while i sleep. two webbed feet pointing straight down at an unnatural angle.

--duck--

i've seen the duck before, of course. cheerily circumnavigating my head to the lullaby version of the 18th variation of rachmaninov's rhapsody on a theme of paganini. but now, in the dim glow of the night light, his sinister presence sends a chill down all 7.5 inches of my spine.

my mother approaches the crib. the duck lurks above. my heart races and my thoughts are consumed with trying to find an innocuous answer to this profound and disturbing question.

why is my mom talking to the duck.

--to be continued--
in the meantime, please share any theories you may have

4 comments:

Unknown said...

MVP - 60 watts is being a little generous don't you think ;-)

Uncle J

Wendy Mihm said...

In all the hours and minutes that Puck the Duck was in The Edge's crib, I never once saw it from that angle. Shivers are running down my spine too and I anxiously await Part II.

Unknown said...

I agree with Uncle J. Ha.

More pics, please!

b7ee6fbdx7 said...

The digital design is sliced into 2D layers and sent to the 3D printer which builds every layer on top of the opposite until an object emerges. This is completed by way of a course of referred to as additive manufacturing, the place successive layers of fabric are created under computer management. These versatile machines are able to to} perform common jobs such as boring/sleeving, surfacing , primary and best newsboy caps camshaft line boring, and basic industrial CNC machining with Rottler CAM software program. Rottler’s CAD Software permits instruments to include many functions and roles in a single multi-purpose machining heart, offering the variety of many different machines in a single package deal. Miller Broach takes nice delight in our broach services as that is what our firm was founded on. Miller Broach manufactures, sharpens and reconditions flat, round, spline, and pot broaches of any size.